Oh wait.
Perhaps I have spoken too soon. A voice suddenly bellows out of nowhere. “Helado, helado, heladooo. Helado, helado, heladooo.”
As I strain over the table to get a better view of the park below, I see a man carrying a box of frozen ice lollies, frantically waving and shouting at the top of his lungs. I smile to myself. What did I expect? I really would be setting myself an impossible task if I went in search for a truly tranquillo spot in Santiago. It just doesn’t exist here. Not only have my trusted earplugs become more of a best friend to me than ever since I crossed the Atlantic all those weeks ago as a bright-eyed, freshly-turned 20 year old, intent on studying and travelling the world, but I have also come to realise that the city of Santiago is really unlike anywhere I have ever been before.
Casting my mind back to my very first day in Santiago, the first thing that struck me about the city was the rather peculiar European vibe...and yet it is nothing like Europe at all. Santiago de Chile is really quite unique. Therefore, sitting her overlooking the beautiful Parque Bustamante, I present you with my guide to the city, in order to bring you a little slice of Santiago, wherever you may be.
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1. Language
Firstly, whilst the Chileans speak notoriously fast - approximately 100mph - they also seem to have a habit of (rather unfortunately for me) dropping a lot of their ‘s’ at the end of words. ‘Ds’ also seem to disappear sometimes… What’s more, Chileans use a lot of slang in their everyday conversations and are renowned for their use of the word ‘Po’. I have come to realise that really, it is nothing more than a word filler; arguably their version of pues and can have the meaning of ‘then’ or apparently ‘man’…to be honest I’m not really sure what the exact translation would be- it’s an odd one I must say.
In fact, the longer I am here, the more it is becoming apparent that Chilean is almost an entirely different language…
A few essentials: Bacán (cool, great); ¿Cachai? (you get me? This is used at the end of nearly every sentence); copete (an alcoholic drink); huevón (this has a hundred different meanings depending on the context and tone, however it is most commonly used as a form of ‘mate/friend’, but can also mean ‘jerk’, someone you don’t know, and ‘nerd’ I think…); carrete (party- the verb being ‘carretear’); chico (small); al tiro (right away); plata (money); gringo/a (a foreign person); pololo (boyfriend or girlfriend), pololear (to go out with someone- my personal favourite), pucha (damn).
So as my Chilean friends repeatedly remind me, I really chose the best place to improve my Spanish, right? A little challenging it may be, yes; however, I wouldn’t have it any other way.
2. Transport
Although Santiago has the most extensive metro system in Latin America - don’t get the metro in rush hour…EVER. I thought the London underground was crazy at peak times, but Santiago’s metro takes rush hour to a whole new level. One day, after an afternoon of shopping at one of South America’s biggest shopping centres, Costanera (a must visit for shopaholics like myself) my friend and I made the mistake of travelling on one of the most popular metro lines at rush hour. After about 10 trains passed us, which were so full that it was physically impossible for anyone to get on or off, we managed to somehow squeeze onto a train where we were nearly suffocated whilst trying to protect our bags of food shopping, desperately hoping our bag of tomatoes wouldn’t purify into salsa. Now that summer is creeping closer, with temperatures (already) of over 30 degrees Celsius, despite it only being the middle of spring, the metro experience is definitely my least favourite part of my day to put it mildly. However, if you are going to be traveling on the metro on a regular basis (I may moan, but it is probably the easiest and cheapest way of making your way around the city) you might want to get yourself a Bip card - Chile’s answer to the London Oyster card.
3. The Roads
Talking of transport, I must warn you that a green man in Santiago de Chile does not necessarily mean that the traffic will stop for you. Often, you will find yourself crossing a road, and cars and buses will just continue driving, simply waiting next to you until you are out of the way to continue. Whilst interestingly in Chile you can in fact turn right on a red light when permitted, if you do want to cross at a zebra crossing, however, don’t expect cars to stop for you. I regret to inform you that the only way to do it is by just starting to cross the road whilst the traffic is still coming and pray to God they stop.
4. Drinks
One of the common drinks you will see throughout the city on the corner of every street especially as summer approaches, is Mote con huesillo, quite possibly one of the most bizarre drinks I have ever come across. Made from wheat and peaches and often sold in street stands or vendor carts, it consists of a sweet liquid made with dried peaches (huesillo) cooked in sugar, water and cinnamon, and then once cooled, mixed with fresh cooked husked wheat (mote).
However, when it comes to alcoholic beverages in Chile, Pisco is their thing. Whether in the form of a Piscola or Pisco Sour, Pisco itself is pretty strong, smells a little like dessert wine and is relatively cheap. A Terremoto on the other hand, is also an iconic Chilean drink literally translated meaning ‘earthquake.’ I can assure you that anyone who has tried this drink certainly knows why…a combination of Pipeño (a type of sweet fermented wine) and a clump of pineapple ice-cream (the so-called ‘secret ingredient’) which when the wine is added, floats up to the top. Apparently the next round usually contains the same drink though smaller, which is called a replica or 'aftershock.’
Finally, of course, the existence of café con piernas. This literally translates to ‘coffee with legs.’ These are essentially coffee shops located around Santiago where the waitresses often on a slightly raised platform, serve coffee in miniskirts, heels or other revealing attire to businessmen…in the middle of the day…totally bizarre I know. Needless to say, this is one place I haven’t ventured to.
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5. Food
Firstly, EVERYTHING comes with avocado (or palta as the Chileans say)…well, I say everything - you will probably find a lot of dishes have avocado in them or an option to add avocado. Even McDonalds have adopted their menu to accommodate the Chilean need for avocado to accompany that Big Mac.
When talking your seat at a restaurant in Santiago, you will find you are immediately presented with a complementary platter of bread and pebre. Pebre is a Chilean condiment made of coriander, chopped onion, peppers, grated tomato and a pinch of salt ‘a gusto.’ However, I must warn you, depending on where you go, you will find some pebre a lot spicier than others…don’t say I didn’t warn you!
Empanadas and Choripanes are also pretty staple elements of the regular Chilean on-the-go diet. An empanada is a stuffed bread or pastry (baked or fried) and is pretty common all across Latin America. In Chile, however, the most traditional empanada filling is called pino; a seasoned mixture of ground beef, onions, raisins, black olives, and hard boiled eggs. A Choripan, on the other hand, is something you will commonly be invited to eat as part of an asado (barbeque) in Chile. Normally served as an appetizer, a Choripan, as you have probably guessed from the name, is essentially a grilled chorizo (sausage) and a pan (crusty bread) such as a marraqueta or baguette, usually served either on its own or with aji (hot sauce) and pebre. I can assure you neither one of these two dishes do anything for your waistline, but are definitely a must try.
A completo is not only something you are pretty much guaranteed to encounter on every street corner, but is the Chilean version of a hot dog. I must admit: although I have never tried one myself and have no intention to any time soon, it normally contains ingredients such as chopped tomatoes, avocados (naturally), mayonnaise, sauerkraut, chili, green sauce and cheese. Depending on the specific combination of ingredients you choose, the main variations of completo include completo tradicional, italiano, dinámico, a la pobre and tomate mayo.
Desert-wise, this one is easy. Dulce de leche (or Manjar), a sort of sweet caramel made by slowly heating sweetened milk until it thickens and changes colour, is simply put on anything and everything.
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6. Markets
Food markets: Mercado Central & La Vega
Whilst Mercado Central is known as Santiago’s celebrated fresh fish market, (coincidently also listed by the National Geographic as one of the Top 10 Food Markets in the world) La Vega is a popular fruit and vegetable market and an excellent and cheap alternative to buying fresh fruit and veg from the supermarkets.
Artisan craft markets: Santa Lucia and Los Dominicos
Navigating your way through both of these artisan markets definitely requires a certain amount of skill. Nevertheless, the endless warrens of stools and stands hidden around every corner, make these markets the perfect places to buy anything from alpaca scarfs, gloves and jumpers, to beautiful hand crafted knickknacks, leather bags, shoes, quirky and somewhat ‘alternative’ jewellery (a travellers trademark), as well as Chile’s beautiful deep blue lapis lazuli in the form of jewellery and ornaments.
7. Museo de Bellas Artes
A bit of a culture vulture? Santiago certainly has its fair share of museums and what’s more, on Sundays entry is always free.
Pablo Neruda’s Houses: It goes without saying that for many literature lovers like myself, when thinking of all things Chilean, the figure of Pablo Neruda immediately springs to mind. Of course, in true Neruda style, the Chilean poet had not one, not two, but three houses in the central region of Chile, and based in Santiago you are pretty much a stone’s throw away from all three of them. Designed by Neruda himself, the eccentric exterior of his houses, full of unique charm and character, certainly provide a fascinating insight into the inspiration behind his masterpieces, and the private and professional life of the man himself, making them definitely worth a visit. You will realise that Neruda had an incredible ability to compile the most intriguing and curious collection of objects together and somehow make it work. Situated in the heart of Santiago’s Barrio Bellavista, La Chascona is very easy to get to and will probably be your first port of call.
La Sebastiana is Pablo Neruda’s second house, located an hour and a half from Santiago in the coastal town of Valparaíso. Built upon dozens of steep hillsides overlooking the Pacific Ocean, Valparaíso is made up of a labyrinth of entwining cobbled streets, coloured houses, a mix-match of different architectural styles and most of all, is characterised by the vibrancy of the street art and graffiti which seemingly covers every wall of every building despite it apparently being strictly prohibited.
La Casa de Isla Negra is approximately 2 hours by bus from the centre of Santiago and is home to Neruda’s third and probably most famous house. Situated in the rather beautiful coastal region of Isla Negra (which in fact despite its deceiving name is not an isla (island) at all), characterised by the dark outcrop of rocks which occupy the shoreline, the area was christened by Neruda himself whose house, la Casa de Isla Negra, has undoubtedly become the main focal point of the area.
Museo de la Memoria y los Derechos Humanos: Dedicated to the commemoration of the victims of the human rights violations during the civic-military regime led by Augusto Pinochet between 1973 and 1990, this museum offers a rather moving yet fascinating insight into a defining period of Chilean history.
Art museums: El museo nacional de bellas artes, el museo de arte contemporáneo (MAC), el museo chileno de arte precolombino y el museo de artes visuales are amongst your best options.
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8. Bellavista
If you want to experience Chilean nightlife at its best, the Bellavista area is known as the bohemian quarters of Santiago. As well as being the source of some of Chile’s best ethnic and local cuisine, in the evening you will find the area buzzing with bars, clubs and street performers running the length of Pío Nono.
9. Santiago from above
Cerro Santa Lucia: A rocky hill transformed into a beautifully landscaped park in the 19th century by Benjamín Vicuña Mackenna, the web of trails and stone stairs leading up to the summit of Santa Lucia hill, offer spectacular views over the city and to the Andes beyond.
San Cristóbal: Above 300m over the city, the top of San Cristóbal hill offers even more spectacular views. With the Chilean National Zoo and a Japanese-style garden at the foothill of Cerro San Cristóbal, at the summit you will find not only the iconic 22m statue of the Blessed Virgin Mary which is lit up at night and can be spotted from all over Santiago throughout the night and day, there is also a sanctuary dedicated to the Immaculate Conception, a small chapel and an amphitheatre.
10. ‘The Chilean way’
No hot water? No problem, you just have to get some ‘the Chilean way’ as they call it. Water pressure problems are a common occurrence in the city. However, it turns out that to get hot water from the shower, the ‘Chilean way’ is to turn all the other hot water taps on in the bathroom and leave them running whilst you shower…as crazy as it sounds, it works!!
In fact, this is just one of the many customs I have noticed from observing the Chileans. I should probably add that it is also important to be patient here in Santiago, as time is certainly not of the essence in Chile, where perhaps a little more reserved in nature than one may expect from the outgoing, extrovert stereotype attached to Latin American culture, people greet one another with one kiss on the cheek, and where a ‘25 minute walk’ will probably in realty be only about 10. ¿Cachai?
